Visions & Verses

What Love Isn't...

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

1 Corinthians 13:4-8 New International Version (NIV)

I've been teaching my Middle and High School Sunday School class about love lately.  Although I feel the generation gap more strongly than ever, it's a valuable exercise to try to remember life at 14 and see the current world through the eyes of a confused, questioning adolescent.  While the technology and pace have changed, the core issues and concerns really haven't. And like so much of life it boils down to love.

As kids begin to see themselves as individuals apart from their family, they begin to see love differently and to ponder what love outside the bonds of family might be like. And this is where we come in, because if we don't tell and show and model Christian, Biblical love, certainly the World will introduce its version of love with all the cultural missteps and miscues and misinformation.

If you read 1 Corinthians 13:4-8, the preeminent 'love passage', you will find a lot of time spent on what love is not. That's a good place to start. For Christians, it is essential to understand that love is not a noun, but an action verb. Love is not something you possess: I HAVE a boyfriend, how do I GET him to love me?, she BELONGS to me... And it's more than emotions: a feeling, a glow, warmth, desire, etc. No, love is something you DO, a decision you make daily (and sometimes hourly). 

Love is choosing to be patient and kind instead of selfish, rude and irritable. Love is forgiving and choosing not to keep a record of wrongs -- forgiving AND forgetting! Love is putting others and their needs first. Love is working it out without getting defensive, bitter or resentful. Love is hoping for the best, and expecting the best. Love is trusting despite the possibility of getting hurt.

When asked, Jesus listed loving God and loving one another as the greatest Commands, the ones which encompassed and summed up all the others.  And, of course, that's true. You can't be stealing from, murdering, coveting and lying about someone if you are actively loving and praying for them. But although it's easy to say, 'Love God and love one another', in practice it is so very challenging. All of us struggle with being lovable. And we all know people who are hard to love. Love takes a lot of work, and if not enough comes back, it's easy to feel resentment or depression and withdraw. Hearts that love can also be broken. 

But for all it's challenges and pitfalls, LOVE is truly the hallmark and essence of a Christian. Jesus said 'they will know you are my followers if you love one another.' Unconditional love is the gift God gave to us in creation. Unconditional love was the gift He gave in making a way for us to be reconciled to Him through the death and resurrection of His son, Jesus. That love is so powerful and so wonderful that it still draws people in to this day. When we love others with the kind of love Jesus demonstrated, it draws people to us. It makes us stand out in stark contrast to the World's version of possessive, emotional love. It makes people want what we have, to know what we know. Being around truly loving people alerts you to that heart-shaped hole in your soul that only a relationship with Jesus can fill.

In our modern world of snide, rude and hurtful tweets, texts, posts and grams; in our era of political sniping, negative campaigns and gotcha journalism; in this time of stereotypes, -isms, and shifting morality; let us be a people who love first -- who leave a calling card of kindness, who cover sin, who forgive easily and anger slowly, who set aside our desires and 'rights' for those of others, acknowledging that this is what Christ did for us, creating a debt of forgiveness, salvation and reconciliation that we can never repay.

“A new command I give you: Love one another. As I have loved you, so you must love one another. By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

John 13:34-36 New International Version (NIV)

Try a Little Tenderness

Therefore if you have any encouragement from being united with Christ, if any comfort from his love, if any common sharing in the Spirit,if any tenderness and compassion, then make my joy complete by being like-minded, having the same love, being one in spirit and of one mind. Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit. Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to your own interests but each of you to the interests of the others. ~Philippians 2:1-4

"What the World Needs Now is Love Sweet Love..." "All You Need Is Love..." "They Will Know We are Christians by Our Love..."  These songs reveal that culturally, we know that love IS the answer. It is a powerful tool for forgiving, compromising, healing and reconciling. It is the very essence of Christianity. And yet, in our supposed Christian nation, we find very little of it being exhibited on our streets, in our media or by our leaders, not to mention in our churches or the myriad households accross the country. Certainly, it has been prophesied in the Bible:  ^"Because of the increase of wickedness, the love of most will grow cold," Matthew 24:12. But why?

I wonder if the problem is more fundamental. I wonder if we have failed to learn what real love is. The depictions of love in the media are very simplistic: romantic love, familial love, lust. These depictions show love as a contract: if you love me, I'll do x; or as an obligation: you must love your children, your parents, your siblings. These are very far from the Biblical love described in 1 Corinthians 13:4-8, patient, kind, humble, putting others' needs before our own, dealing with personal issues privately. I can't really say that in my 50 some years on the planet I've seen many examples of this kind of love. It is admittedly very difficult. Trying intentionally to live lovingly for the last 20 years has been a real struggle. And living with love conflicts with some strong cultural values, like holding a grudge, publically airing grievances, being right, getting our way, having control, saying 'I told you so'.... 

Love includes concepts of integrity, humility, compassion, compromise, tenderness, kindness, tact, diplomacy and self-sacrifice. These qualities are often portrayed as weaknesses which can be exploited by the savvy or cruel. I imagine very few textbooks on business administration link these qualities with success. And fewer practitioners dare to use them in the world of business, law or politics. Certainly, our recent and prolonged standoffs between the President and Congress are evidence of this.

Our personal actions always have consequences for those around us. Always. Although it can certainly be taken too far, it is nevertheless a good practice to consider the impact our actions will have. On a personal level this will change your life and relationships for the better quickly. On a national level, it can change the world. Politicians might decide to compromise rather than leaving innocent federal workers without a paycheck for months. They might consider actual capabilities and expectations before sending brave, intellegent, highly competent soldiers and patriots into harm's way. They might come to realize that the only way to truly address the exploitation, violence and criminality of illegal immigration is to stay in a chamber room negotiating, compromising and considering until rational, well thought out policy can be revealed and passed. They might come to grasp that although fixing our crumbling infrastructure will take years of work which will not yield them many re-election votes, it is nevertheless crucial for the thousands of people and businesses using our bridges, ports, roadways, power grids and sewers.

And so, my prayer is that we, as a nation, and a world, might wake up to the power of tenderness. Instead of belittling strangers on social media, we might encourage and uplift. Rather than believing the worst about a public figure, we might reserve judgement and pray for them instead. Instead of pointing a critical finger at all that is wrong, we might seek to see what is right, and broadcast and nurture that. Or perhaps seek to fix it ourselves. Mother Teresa, Ghandi, Martin Luther King, Jr. and even Martin Luther all saw injustices that were not being addressed and did not think it beyond them to step up and work for change. They started small, individually, and the rightness of their cause grew into a movement.

All of us have the power to brighten the corner we're in. A kind word or gesture at work. Pitching in at home. Biting our critical tongue. Refusing to repay meaness with meaness. Letting go of the need for the last word or revenge. Gently encouraging those we might have turned our backs on in the past. Nothing else could be more important. Nothing less will change the world for the better.

By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another. ~John 13:35

 

Christmas in July Sale

 There's a sale going on at Zazzle right now that is just too good not to tell you about! It's their Christmas in July Sale and many of my most popular products are 60% Off, including cards, postcards and invitations. That's ALL cards, postcards and invitations, not just Christmas themes. So if you have a Shower, Birthday, Baptism, Anniversary or any other big occasion coming up, now is the time to order those invitations, rsvps, thank you notes and more! Here's a glimpse of some of my collections, with links for you to check out. Or peruse my store here!

AND this sale is pretty massive, so if you're in the market for any of these items, the deals are fantastic. To buy from MY store, click the link above, but Zazzle has products designed by many designers for all styles and themes! And if you have an idea for something and don't see it, just contact me and I can custom design it for you!!

 

60% Off

• Greeting Cards
• Invitations
• Photo Cards
• Postcards
• Stickers
• Stockings

50% Off

• Fleece Blankets
• Gift Tags
• Pewter Ornaments
• Sherpa Blankets

40% Off

• Gift Bags
• Magnets
• Rubber Stamps
• Serving Trays
• Tote Bags

30% Off

• Aprons
• Banners
• Pillows
• Wrapping Paper

15% Off

• Tree Skirts
• Ceramic Ornaments
• Ribbon
• Tissue Paper
• Wine Bags
• Foil Cards
• SHOP ALL PRODUCTS

Pearls of Wisdom

  If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.

James 1:5 New International Version (NIV)

In my close circle of friends, the youngest of our children recently turned 18, making us all parents of adult children now. It's quite an adjustment. You know you have to let them go and make their own decisions, but it's hard to sit by and watch. And we find ourselves discussing our children, our hopes and fears for them, and their choices A LOT. Some kids need counseling on slowing down, others need to be pushed forward, all of them need our support and love.

What kids need most of all is wisdom. College and the internet can provide knowledge and data and facts, but it is wisdom that scrutinizes those data and facts and puts the knowledge into action in a way that will be useful. And our world has a very different idea of what is wise compared to Biblical principles. Our society tends to define your worth as person by financial success. What school you attended, what profession you pursue, the type of car you drive or handbag you carry often seem to matter more than personal integrity and character. Hedonistic pursuits of new cuisines, craft beer, wine tastings and the latest fashion and hairstyles often fill up popular social media sites like Snapchat, Instagram and Facebook. Meanwhile, it is a challenge to find photos or stories of people donating their time, possessions or money to charitable organizations or church functions. People know their rights and demand them, with very little acknowledgement that those individual freedoms have always been tempered by the overall rights of the community. We were designed to be in fellowship and community with others, but as a whole we seem much more focused on ourselves and individuals than on 'society', 'the state' or our neighborhoods.

So as I learn to let go of my children and let God work in their lives and their decisions, I pray constantly for them to be granted God's wisdom. Wisdom to make right choices, wisdom to be Godly people and not worldly people, wisdom to not be satisfied with what is 'good enough' but to strive for whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—anything excellent or praiseworthy (Philippians 4:8). Most of all I pray for them to have the wisdom to choose God -- to ask themselves in any situation or conversation, 'what would Jesus do?' In our highly individualized society, it's good to remind ourselves and our kids that our daily prayer should be to be less like us and more like Jesus. Because, truly, only the sacrificial, intimate love of Jesus can bring love, peace and inner contentment to our current world.

The Desires of Your Heart

But the Spirit produces love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, humility, and self-control. There is no law against such things as these.

-Galatians 5:22-23 Good News Translation (GNT)

We're needy. We really are. Food, shelter, clothes, hygiene, a job, a family, a sense of belonging, a sense of self-worth, love, acceptance, value, skills...we need all of that. But that's how it's supposed to be. Just like babies are dependent on their parents for every single thing, Lord God wants us to be dependent on Him for our every need. Jesus tells us in Matthew 6:25-34 that  God feeds the birds and makes flowers beautiful, and He loves us so much more than them. "So do not worry, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." Our Heavenly Father desires to give us good gifts that will make us happy and enrich our lives. 

Hmmm, there must be a 'catch' you think. Well, perhaps. Parents give good things to their children to encourage them to grow into good, accomplished, grateful, respectful adults. And God gives us good things to grow us into good, godly, humble, patient, loving and self-disciplined people. So the 'catch' is gradually changing the desires of our hearts to be more in line with His desires for us. If the desire of your heart is a new Porsche, I wouldn't hold your breath waiting for it to arrive. God isn't Santa Claus or a spiritual ATM. He gives you things that will develop you into the best person you can be. A young Pastor leading two small churches miles apart might be granted a new car, maybe, but a Porsche? Probably not. And if it's a Porsche you truly desire, don't be surprised to find God starting work on your generosity, pride and vanity. Perhaps a family in your neighborhood will lose their home to fire. God will be watching to see if He can trust you to share what you have with those less fortunate. Pretty soon, the desire of your heart will be to bless others in generous ways. You'll find yourself praying for others and denying your 'wants' in favor of your 'needs'. And that is when God can truly start blessing you. Imagine a stack of presents filled with Love, Joy, Peace, Patience, Kindness, Goodness, Faith, Humility and Self-Control! When you wear those into the office or to a family gathering, people will NOTICE. They'll want what you have. Those desires of your heart will point people to God...and to the greatest of all His wonderful gifts: Jesus' sacrifice on the cross for our eternal salvation! And this same sacrifice is what allows us to go straight to God, our 'Daddy,' just like little children, full of love and wonder, sitting at His feet, listening to His stories, desiring to be the person He already thinks we are, in an intimate bond of love. That relationship might be the best gift of all.

But when the right time finally came, God sent his own Son. He came as the son of a human mother and lived under the Jewish Law, to redeem those who were under the Law, so that we might become God's children.  To show that you are his children, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who cries out, “Father, my Father.” So then, you are no longer a slave but a child. And since you are his child, God will give you all that he has for his children.

-Galatians 4:4-7 Good News Translation (GNT)